We all know that losing a pet
is absolutely devastating for the family of the dog, cat, or other
furry relative, but a recent Facebook post that’s now going viral
reveals just how painful it is for the veterinarian as well. Brenda Gough, a vet who lives in Burford, Canada, recently described how it feels to euthanize a dog on her Facebook page, and her words are absolutely heartbreaking.
“So, you bring me this puppy—she kisses my face, devours the cookies I
offer, and our friendship starts,” Gough begins. “Several visits later,
he starts to learn where all the cookie jars are in the clinic, and
that lady in the white coat? Well, she’s okay…”
Naturally, she writes, vets can’t help but fall in love with their pet patients
and they enjoy watching them grow up and become a real member of the
family. They remember the day that she ate someone’s underwear, the day
he had a successful surgery, and countless other moments in your pet’s
life.
“So many adventures, so little time,” Gough writes. “And here we are, 15 or so odd years later, having to say goodbye.”
Gough goes on to explain how difficult it is to have to tell the family that he’s got heart disease or she’s got cancer and the medication isn’t working anymore, so the most humane thing to do would be to let them cross the Rainbow Bridge with as much love and as little pain as possible.
“I
feel like I have failed him and you when I have run out of options to
keep them, and you, comfortable and happy,” she explains. “So now it’s
time, and I am supposed to be professional. Objective. I am the doctor.
Calm. Cool. Collected. Always under control.”
Gough writes that in
these moments, she wants to fall apart, but she can’t. The technicians
put the catheter in. The support staff does the paperwork. “Trust me,
they may not show it, but their hearts are breaking for you,” she
writes.
But, ultimately, Gough notes, the vet is the one who has to administer the shot.
“I
have the needle in the pocket of my white coat. The same pocket that
was always full of treats for him. I take a deep yoga breath and come
into the room.”
She goes into the room to find the dog “giving
[her] that sweet look she always does, the one that is followed by puppy
kisses and a glance at the cookie jar.” But her illness and her age has made her weak.
“She
is ready,” Gough writes. “You are not. I am not.” But Gough has to stay
strong, not just for the dog but for the family members who are there
getting ready to say goodbye to their best friend.
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“She would keep going as long as we asked her to. But we can’t ask
her to anymore. It’s not fair to her. I wish our human hearts could be
so giving all the time. I wish I could be the person my dog thinks I
am,” she writes. “I wish I could find a way for them to live forever.
But I don’t have those magical powers. I am just a vet.”
And then comes the worst part.
“Her body relaxes, she is in your arms and you are sobbing. Another family has lost one of its most cherished members.
I put my stethoscope to her heart to make sure it has stopped, but she
is held so tight to your chest that maybe that is your heart I hear
pounding or maybe it’s mine and all the blood [is] rushing through my
ears as I try so, so, so hard not to turn into a blubbering mess.”
After that, Gough writes, she confirms that the pet has passed and the owner lays him gently on the table. She gives the grieving family warm hugs
and they leave the room. “The door closes behind you and I don’t know
if you hear this, but I sob hysterically into your pet’s ear,” she
explains. “And you have to face what I know will be one of the hardest
parts of today: entering that house and they are not there to greet you.”
Gough
ends the post by saying she hopes pet owners know that she wishes they
never had to face that and that she’s so grateful just to be part of
people’s journeys with their pets.
Gough’s post, which is from
September 26th, has received more than 114,000 likes and 126,000 shares
in the past week, as well as thousands of comments from sympathetic
owners and colleagues who could truly relate to her sentiments.
“As a long time vet tech, I have had these exact emotions,” one Facebook user wrote. “It truly is heartbreaking
and I’ve had to walk outside the hospital to cry. But the rewards of
saving lives, bringing lives into the world, meeting wonderful pets and their people has made it all worth it!”
And for a poignant story that proves the pain of this loss, read the viral tweet that perfectly captures the pain of losing a pet.
